So I have sat here for ages wondering how best to start this. How best to tell you what you mean to me. You know that I have “feelings” for you. Love is so clichéd a word for what I feel for you. And that word is thrown about so casually by people these days that I no longer like it that much.
But what can I do, I am limited by the words of the languages of the world. And none of the best come even close to defining you. And I know, you will not probably believe it if I tell you, but truth be told if I cannot have you in my life, I would rather not have any other guy. And God, it has been a long and hard journey to get to you. So much heartbreaks, so many tears, so many things that I did not understand, and I still don’t but if all of this means that we are together in the end, then I do not wish for anything else.
I told you, I am not a complicated girl who doesn't know what her priorities in her life her are and whatt kind of life she wants. I do not wish for much. A family is what I want as the first thing. Adventure and togetherness that is what I crave for. I am not a person who socialises too much. Oh I know a lot of people. A whole damn lot. But the number of people whom I count as my friends? I can count them on my fingers. And I probably won’t even need both hands.
But the ones I care for, I care very much. Some would probably say too much. Maybe they are right but I have always believed that love is not something that should be held back. I want to enjoy every damn thing there is. I want to sit beside you at 3 in the night and watch a movie. I want to take your hand and dance in an empty parking lot. I want to wake up beside you every day. Kiss you good night every single night. And hug you tight while you sleep.
You are all my hopes and all my dreams rolled into one. I need no others while you are with me. Everything I do is so that I can be closer to you. So that the “we” that I am dreaming of is possible. People tell me that it is unrealistic. That this is an obsession. That this will wear off. I doubt that. You want to know why?
Because even though it has been only few time since I got to first know you I still feel like I do not know you enough. Even though you have told me everything that you think there is to tell about you, I still can tell you millions which you never did and I had to find out for myself. And all I can do is sit around and wonder. How? How could something so pure survive out here? How is it possible that you do not see how beautifully amazing you are?
You will one day Monsieur. I promise.
Even if it takes me my whole life, one day you will see in yourself that which I have seen for in you. Since the time I know you Even if it took me a lot of time to get to it.
You know I have come to a realisation that there are only two loves that matter in someone’s life- the first and the last. The first because it changes us. And the last because it accepts us.
And I want you to be my last. And I believe you to be my last!
And I hope you will stay!
And no matter wat hardship might come into our way!
I just wana say....
You are the man of my dreams Monsieur!
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